Tidings
by Sandpiper
Summary: Pointless Christmas fluff basically. S/V
1. Chapter 1

"I still can't find it!!!" Francie's voice bellowed through the kitchen.  
I rolled my eyes, "Will you calm down! I'm sure we'll find it!"  
I heard her groan and then brush past me toward the laundry room. She opened the dryer door and started pulling clothes out and tossing them over her shoulder.  
"Hey! Oh, that's great Fran, throw some more clean clothes on the floor why don't you?" I nagged.  
"Ah ha! Found it!" She announced triumphantly, holding her favorite black skirt up to emphasize her victory.  
"Well that's a relief. The world isn't ending," I muttered sarcastically as I picked up the items she had left on the floor and shoved them back into dryer. Francie glared at me playfully before heading back to her room to pack the shirt into her already full suit case. She closed the strained zipper and set her bags by the front door.  
"Well that looks like that's it," she said.  
"Yeah looks like you're all ready," I agreed. The irony of the situation was not lost on me, for once it was Francie who was leaving tomorrow morning instead of me.  
"What are you smiling about?" she asked with a giggle.  
I took a minute before deciding that there would be no harm in telling her, "I was just thinking that it was funny. It's usually the other way around. You're usually the one helping me pack for a trip."  
She laughed and then quickly grew serious, "Listen Syd, if you wanted to.....I mean you know you'd be welcome at my family's house."  
"Francie-" I protested.  
"Sydney it is Christmas, I feel bad leaving you here alone," she began.  
"You're worse than Will you know that? I'm not a two year old! I told you already you have nothing to feel bad about. Besides I won't be alone, my dad's here," I offered in hopes that it would get her to drop the subject. In truth, though it would be great to spend Christmas with my father like in a normal family, the chances of it really happening were unlikely.  
"Yeah, but I just don't want you to be lonely," she said.  
"I won't be!" I said firmly.  
She sighed and then look up at me with a wicked smile, "You know you seem pretty adamant about me going on this trip. Maybe you're planning to invite someone over whom I don't know about?"  
I rolled my eyes, "Very funny!" Nope, sorry Francie, it's not a cover for some torrid affair, my life really is this pathetic! Of course I didn't say that last part out loud.  
"Okay, okay, if you don't want to talk about it," she teased, I rolled my eyes again which caused her to laugh, "Goodnight hon."  
"Goodnight," I responded as the two of us retreated to our respective rooms.  
I crawled into bed and sighed heavily. As if it weren't bad enough that I was spending Christmas alone this year, apparently all of my friends thought that I was some pity case for it. Dixon invited me to Christmas dinner, Francie invited me to come along with her to Sacramento, and Will, who had gone to visit relatives in the mid-west, had even called them to cancel at first. I remembered how I practically had to force him to get on the plane.  
I sighed again and turned over onto my side. I wished for at least one day out of the year when I could just be normal. When I could go to holiday parties and drink however much I wanted without having to worry about anything other than having a hangover the next morning, when I didn't stand in the middle of JC Penny wondering if SD-6 was watching me as I pawed through the gift items that were on sale, when I wouldn't have to think about whether I could tell my friend the truth about what I was thinking or whether I would have to lie to her. Day when I could be normal........yeah that was definitely on the top of my list, but unfortunately I knew that even Santa Clause couldn't manage that one.


	2. Chapter 2

"Sydney!" Sloane's voice snapped me back to earth.  
"Yes, um.....Dixon and I saw Sark's representatives make a switch however we do not know what the switch was made for. We managed to acquire copies of their hard drive though so if it's on there we'll find out." I said recovering quickly.   
"Very good," Sloane said and then continued to drone on about whatever it was he was talking about before. I had no idea what it was given that I hadn't been listening. It was a little embarrassing though, a spy caught daydreaming during a briefing.   
_"Real professional Syd," _I thought to myself, _"Oh well, who cares? It's SD-6."  
_ I was just not in the mood to pretend to be enthusiastic today. I wanted nothing more than to go home to a warm bath and a nice cup of tea.   
People standing told me that the briefing was over. I gathered up my things and quickly headed out the door before Sloane could think of something he wanted to say to me in private. I wasn't sure I could have handled that with the way I was feeling.   
I went to my desk and began loading up my briefcase, eager to get as far away from Credit Dauphine as possible.   
"The days just seem to get longer and longer don't they?" Dixon asked coming up behind me.  
"Yeah," I agreed.  
"So, should I tell Diane to expect another person for dinner?" he asked as he gathered up his own briefcase.  
"Nah, as much as I appreciate the offer, I'll probably just spend some time relaxing at home," I said.  
"Well if you change your mind the offer still stands," he offered  
I smiled at him, "Thanks Dixon."  
"I'll see you later," he called as I headed toward the elevator.  
"Bye, Merry Christmas," I responded before stepping inside.  
I waited until I got out of the parking lot before gulping down two Advil. I only had one thing left that I had to do today and it was certainly the least stressful of all. Next up was to meet Vaughn for my debriefing.

I arrived relatively on time for the debriefing. Considering the fact that I had to battle rush hour traffic four days before Christmas to get there I'd say I did pretty well timing wise. Vaughn was already there of course. He smiled warmly as I approached. I returned the smile. Wishing for a moment that I could see him smile more often. Our conversations were usually solemn and professional, we hardly ever got moments where we could just be ourselves it was always business.  
"I got the copy of the hard drive just like the one SD-6 has," I said handing him the disk.  
"Good, we'll get it analyzed as soon as possible," he said and took the disk from me. I nodded in response. "Are you okay?"  
It would figure he'd notice, he always seemed to be so perceptive about how I was feeling. "Yeah, I'm fine I'm just tired and kind of have a headache. Sloane just seemed to be extra unbearable today," I explained.  
"Oh, I'm sorry," He said.  
"Well.....at least even he gives holidays off," I shrugged, trying to seem like I wasn't very bothered by it.  
"Yeah," he agreed.  
"Well, I'll see you in a few days then," I said.  
"Goodnight, Syd," he responded. We looked at each other silently for a brief moment before breaking eye contact. I nodded slightly to him and then turned to leave.  
As I exited the warehouse an empty feeling came with me. _"I wonder what Vaughn's doing for Christmas?"_ I thought to myself, then shook my head, _"__There's no point in wondering that. I wouldn't matter even if you did know!"  
_ With a sigh I started the ignition and pulled out of the parking space.

I dropped my coat and briefcase by the door as I arrived home and massaged the knots in my neck. God I was tired. In the kitchen I found a tin with pictures of holly, reindeer, and candy canes on it. On the top was a note.

"Dear Syd,  
Thought you might want these later. Think of it as an extra present.  
Love, Francie"

When I opened the tin and saw what was inside, I chuckled lightly. Leave it to Francie to think of something like that. I picked out a snowman shaped one and sat down on the couch to munch on it while I searched for something on TV to keep myself entertained for a few hours.


	3. Chapter 3

"Oh, I don't deserve such happiness!" Ebenezer Scrooge scowled grumpily before bursting into giggles again, "I can't help it. Why I just can't help it."

I yawned and picked up the remote. After surfing through the channels for a few minutes and finding nothing I switched the TV off and rolled onto my stomach to retrieve another cookie from the tin, which was no on the coffee table in front of me. I brought it to my lips before tossing it back with a groan. I suppose sitting at home alone with nothing to do but watch Christmas specials was normal just like I wanted.  
This was really disappointing. I had five precious days off from SD-6 and so far it had only been about twenty minutes and I had come up with nothing better to do than stare at the TV not really watching it while I drowned my sorrows in sugar cookies. As much as I would have liked to avoid it I knew that I would pretty much spend the next few days brooding about my mother, and my father, and SD-6, and Vaughn. It was pretty much a given that he would show up in my thoughts eventually.  
_"I'll bet he has a big family. With lots of traditions," _I thought. Suddenly I got up off the couch and headed toward my room. This was completely ridiculous! Just because my family was screwed up meant that I had to spend the holidays alone and bored out of my mind? My friend had invited me to spend Christmas with her and I said no. I had no reason to turn down her offer other than because it hurt my pride. I don't answer to Francie or anyone else. I shook my head and pulled my overnight bag down out of the closet.

After loading everything into the car and making a quick stop to pick up some extra gifts for Francie's family I set out toward Sacramento. The drive was pretty much a blur. Nat King Cole singing Christmas Carols on the radio and numerous cups of coffee.   
I made it about half way between Los Angeles and Sacramento. I was stopped at a traffic light, it turned green and I started to go. Just as I was pulling through the middle of the intersection a silver Dodge came barreling around the corner ran the red light and slammed into the side of me.   
My car spun sideways before it came to a stop against the median and the air bag exploded into my face. Leaned back in my seat and shoved it down. I rubbed the bridge of my nose briefly. It was sore but not broken. I knew all about broken noses.   
I glanced out the window and saw the passengers getting out of the other car. They were dressed up in bright holiday garb. I didn't catch all of what they were saying but part of a sentence reached my ear, "Jerry! I told you, you were too drunk to drive!"  
I clenched my fists tightly at my sides and reminded myself over and over again not to use my combat skills against innocent civilians, even if they were deserving of it.  
"It's the most wonderful time of the year," I muttered sarcastically as I opened my door and slid out of the car. 


	4. Chapter 4

"Well it isn't totaled, but it's banged up pretty good," Greg the tow truck guy said after assessing the damage on my car. My interview with the police was short since the couple who hit me were clearly drunk. The tow truck arrived just as the paramedics were finished checking me out so I rode with Greg to the body shop.  
"Is it drivable?" I asked.  
"Oh, definitely not. There's a few days worth of damage to repair here," he said and then looked at the luggage resting by my feet, "I take you were on your way some where?"  
I nodded. He winched, "I'm awful sorry about this. Listen I tell you what, I've been closed this week so I don't have anything else to work on right now so I can get the repairs done for you probably by Christmas day but that's the earliest possible."  
"Thank you," I said simply. Wonderful. Apparently my life sucked so much that even the tow truck guy pitied me, but he had just offered to work overtime for it so I wasn't about to complain.  
"Listen would you happen to know of a hotel in town?" I asked.  
"Well there are a couple but I think they're all full." he said thoughtfully, "There is this bed and breakfast about a few miles north of here. I don't know if they're taking guests this time of year but I could drive you up there if you want."  
"Thank you I appreciate that," I said.

I climbed up the steps of the house and knocked on the door. After a few minutes some lights came on and a woman who looked to be in her early fifties opened the door.  
"Yes?" she asked tiredly.  
"Hi, I'm sorry to come by so late but I was in a car accident so I was wondering if you were taking guests?" I explained.  
"Sure, come in," she said. I waved Greg off and followed her inside. The house was old Victorian style with some tasteful Christmas decorations in each room. She lead me up the stairs and unlocked one of the rooms.  
"Here you are," she said. I thanked her and began looking through my purse for a credit card. "Oh no it's too late for that tonight. We'll take care of payment in the morning," she said.  
"Thank you," I replied gratefully.  
"Don't mention it," she started to walk away then turned back around, "Oh just one thing though. What is your name?"  
"Sydney Bristow," I responded.  
"Okay very good," she said and jotted my name down on a notepad from her pocket, "You have a goodnight Ms. Bristow."  
"Thank you," I smiled faintly and went turned inside.   
The room was small and cozy. Normally I would have loved it but right then I was too tired to care about anything. I dropped my luggage onto the floor, changed into my pajamas, and got into bed without even bothering to brush my teeth.  
My body ached all over and I felt even worse inside. Instead of gracefully dealing with holiday angst like the intelligent rational woman I was supposed to be I decided to drive up to my friend's parent's house when I didn't really even want to. I just got tired of being bored. So now I was stuck miles from both L.A. and Sacramento until at least after Christmas and once my car was fixed I had nothing to go home to other than a big hassle with the other driver's insurance company.  
I sniffed softly and brushed a tear off my cheek. I knew it was foolish but I felt like crap at that moment. Holidays were not supposed to be this way. Holidays were supposed to be a time when you invited your relatives over and listened to them complain about each other, decorated Christmas trees, stressed out about finding the perfect gift, and spent hours making a big lovely dinner. However it hadn't been that way for me since before I was six years old. It had been twenty one years since the last time I had just a normal Christmas. But Bristows didn't do that, Bristows either spent their lives isolated like my dad or did stupid, pre-teenish, things like me.   
I drifted off to sleep wondering if next year I could get Marshall to make me some drug that would make me go to sleep until after New Year's Day.


	5. Chapter 5

Going home for the holidays. According to TV commercials it's the perfect thing to do, and will make you able to forget your everyday worries while spending quality time with your family. If only it were that simple. I love my mom but for some reason I just wasn't that excited about seeing her this year.  
Actually that's a lie, I knew exactly why. I didn't want to go visit her because it meant I would have to leave town, and more importantly leave Sydney.   
_"You know there's a fine line between caring and obsession,"_ my subconscious reminded me.   
As if I really needed reminding. I knew that it wasn't healthy for me to have trouble sleeping at night when she was on a mission, or to worry about going out of town for fear that something might happen to Sydney and I wouldn't be there to help her with it.  
I remembered our meeting the other day. She seemed upset and stressed out. When I asked her what was wrong she told me it was Sloane getting on her nerves, but I suspected there was more to it than that. I would imagine that this would be a hard time of year for her. Everywhere she went she'd see symbols of the spirit of family togetherness, reminders of all of the problems she's had this year. Problems that I saw her face with amazing strength. I only wished that I could be there for her now.   
_"I wonder if she misses me.........okay you are so full of yourself! First of all Sydney Bristow can take care of herself. Secondly she's probably having fun on her friends right now and thanking her lucky stars that she won't have to worry about SD-6 or the CIA for a few days." _The two sides of my mind argued. I told them to shut up and returned my focus to the road. 

At about 6:00 that morning I pulled up in front of my mom's house. I drove around to the side and parked next to a blue Lexus that I did not recognize as belonging to anyone I knew. I went around to the back door that lead into the kitchen, and let myself in with the key that usually hung unused at the bottom of my key chain.  
I didn't expect her to be awake yet so I set my duffle bag down by the door and got to work on making a pot of coffee. She came into the kitchen about half an hour later just as I was in the middle of my first cup.  
"I was just not destined to sleep this morning," she said shaking her head.  
"Hey mom," I said and attempted a smile as I got up to hug her.  
"Merry Christmas," she said as she hugged me back.  
"Who's car is that outside?" I asked.  
"You mean the blue one? Mr. and Mrs. Clarkston in room two," she responded.  
I set my coffee cup down to look at her, "Wait a minute! You're taking guest over Christmas?"  
"Well you were the only person coming over this year so I figured there was no reason to shut down just for two people," she said calmly as she sat down at the table across from me and poured herself a cup of coffee.  
"And you talk about how much I work," I pointed out.  
She looked at me skeptically, "Michael, your line of work and mine are........considerably different."  
I knew she had a point so I didn't argue. "Besides," she went on, "It's only a few guests. There's Mr. and Mrs. Clarkston, and a couple named Dave and Clara, oh and late last night a young woman showed up. She said she had car trouble I think."  
"Whatever you say mom," I teased.  
She chuckled lightly, "Well while we're on the subject. How are things at your office?"  
"Fine," I said nodding.  
_"Yeah right! 'Fine' is probably the last word I would use to describe it,"_ I thought to myself, which yet again brought me back to thinking about Sydney, _"Damn it! Can't I get her off my mind for at least five minutes?"  
_"Michael are you alright?" my mom's voice interrupted my thoughts.  
"Yeah, I'm fine," I said, "Actually I'm a little tired. I think I'll take my stuff to the guest room and try to get some sleep."  
"Okay," she said. I picked up my stuff and headed to the side of the house where her room and living quarters were. 


	6. Chapter 6

Sydney POV

When I woke up the next morning my watch said 9:45. That was definitely later than I usually slept. I got out of the bed and stretched my back. It was no longer sore, which was good since the paramedics drilled it into my head that they only reason they were releasing me was because I didn't appear to be in shock, but if I had any kind of pain by the morning I was to go to a hospital immediately.   
I stood around for a moment thinking about what I should do next, and then decided to head down stairs to see if there was a phone I could use to call Francie. Not that she knew I was coming up to visit her, but if she called the house and I didn't answer she might get worried. I changed into some regular clothes and went down the stairs. It was already occupied by two couples. The was an elderly couple on the left side of the room and another couple that looked to be about my age, and the woman who owned the place was sitting in a chair on the right side.  
_"Looks like I'm not the only person staying here."  
_"Good morning. Everyone this is......Sydney, right?" she asked. I nodded, "This is Sydney. Sydney this is Dave and Clara and James and Harriet Clarkston."  
"Hi," I said.  
"Hello, Sydney," the all responded.   
"So what brings you here?" Mr. Clarkston asked me.  
"Well, actually I was in a car accident," I said.  
"Oh, I'm sorry," Dave said.  
"Well, I'm just lucky I found a place to stay last night," I said trying to be polite.  
"Yeah, Dave and I......well we eloped," she said blushing, "we were surprised that this place was open too."  
The owner laughed lightly, "Well, off all the people I invited only my son said he could come visit so I figured why close for just two people?"  
I would be lying if I said that statement tipped me off. I may have been intuitive but not that much. I didn't make any connection what so ever until I heard the footsteps in the next room, at which point I somehow knew what was coming next. I know it sounds ridiculous since it would be perfectly normal for a woman her age to have a grown son, but I swear somehow I felt his presence before I saw him.  
"Oh there you are. Everyone this is my son Michael, this is Mr. and Mrs. Clarkston, Dave and Clara, and Sydney," the owner, Vaughn's mother, introduced everyone as I stood frozen in my spot on the floor. I'm a better actress than Vaughn so the look of shock was evident on his face but he recovered quickly.  
"Hello," the other guests said to him.  
"Hi," he said to me. I gave a small smile in response. The kind you would give stranger as a way of being polite. I stood quietly as the conversation progressed oblivious to the palpable tension in the room. I suddenly saw the perfect moment to cut in.  
"Oh, you know what I never gave you my credit card. I'll just run up stairs and get it," I excused my self and left the room. I took a moment to organize my thoughts as I climbed the stairs, my mission to call Francie long forgotten. If it weren't so morbid I would have laughed at the irony of it all. A woman who owns a simple inn gets a guest who is the daughter of the woman who killed her husband and and works at the CIA with her son who just happens to be home this holiday.  
_"Obviously whatever higher force there is out there has a very sick sense of humor,"_ I thought to myself.

Vaughn POV

I couldn't get to sleep. No matter how hard I tried to, there was just too much on my mind. Finally after just laying around for three hours I decided that I might as well give it up. I left my room and headed down the hall. I heard mom talking with her guests in the front living room. I didn't plan to join them, I actually planned to go get my lap top from the car thinking I could catch up on some paperwork, I just happened to pass by on my way through the kitchen.   
Who knew that I would find the very person who I had been trying for the past twelve hours not to think about standing in the middle of the room? I couldn't completely hide my shock, but I think I covered it up alright. She was a little calmer about it but I could tell she was just as surprised. A couple minutes after we first 'met' Sydney excused herself to go find a credit card. I caught on to her plan and excused myself as well. I went through the kitchen and took the stairs in the laundry room up to the second floor.   
I waited for her in the hall trying to organize my thoughts. I didn't have long though, before she appeared at the top.  
"How did you get up here before me?!" she asked surprised.  
"Oh, there's another staircase at the back of the house," I explained.  
"Oh," she said.  
"Listen what are you doing here?" I demanded lowering my voice.  
"Well how was I suppose to know? You never said anything about your mother owning a bed and breakfast so I had absolutely no way of knowing!" she snapped back. I knew she was right..   
"Look if it bothers you that much I can find another place to stay. It's no big deal." she went on.  
"No, Syd I didn't mean it that way," I said regretting how surly my question has sounded, "I was just.........I was thinking about SD-6 actually. Do they know you're here?"  
She shook her head, "No, actually you're the only person who knows I'm not in L.A."  
Before I had a chance to answer back footsteps on the stairs interrupted us. She nodded at me and went into her room as I turned back down the hall. SD-6 didn't know she where she was. So theoretically she was safe here. All we had to do was pretend we didn't know each other and everything would be just fine.  
_"Just fine," _I repeated to myself as I headed back down the stairs.


	7. Chapter 7

I considered shutting down the inn when Michael told me he was coming, but I was rather glad I didn't. He he'd been there for two days and still wasn't exactly good company. Don't get me wrong I love my son and I didn't expect him to be so excited that he'd be asking me "Is it time to open presents yet?" every five minutes like when he was three, but was it really that much to ask to act some way other than distant and tense?  
Surely having guests over the holidays wouldn't bother him that much? I wondered to myself as I walked into the living room. He was sitting here in a chair looking at an unknown spot on the fire place. After a couple of minutes standing there without him even showing that he noticed my presence in the room I gave up. Obviously he was not going to be in a talkative mood anytime soon.   
My attention was drawn to the sound of footsteps coming down the stairs. Everyone else had gone out earlier that morning so I knew it had to be the woman in room three, Sydney.  
"Good morning," I greeted warmly as the came to the bottom of the stairs.  
"Good morning," she said back, also seeming shy and tense. I felt rather sorry for her actually. I got the impression she was on her way somewhere when she had the problem with her car. Obviously if she had prior plans, spending Christmas alone would be difficult.   
"So what do you have planned for today?" I asked in an attempt to make conversation.  
"Nothing," she shrugged.  
"Well you know there's lots of things to do downtown. It's Christmas Eve so there probably won't be many stores open but I'm sure you could find something," I suggested. The tourists who stayed here were often looking for things to do so I was pretty well equipped to give advice about what there was around the area.  
"Well, I appreciate that but my car's still in the shop so I'll probably just stay in my room and read," she said hesitantly.  
I sighed in exasperation. Was everyone in the world determined to do nothing but mope around today and make me depressed? I suddenly got a mischievous idea.  
"Michael will take you," I said.  
That seemed to snap him out of his daze instantly, "What?"  
"Oh, no, no. I really appreciate the offer but I couldn't ask something like that," she said shaking her head.  
"He doesn't mind. Do you dear?" I asked with my best June Clever smile.  
"Umm..." he started.  
"Besides we're out of milk, I need you to pick up some," I said, thoroughly enjoying the look he gave me in response.  
"Great," I said and ushered both of them out the door. It was mean, yes. I knew he would kill me for it later, but my son was just too easy to annoy. I thought to myself with a laugh.


	8. Chapter 8

I suppose it's not nice to laugh at your handler, but I couldn't help it. He looked so embarrassed. He turned to me once he finished glaring at the door and I stopped laughing.  
"Sorry about that," He said.  
"It's okay," I said struggling not to laugh again.  
"Listen just ignore her okay? If you don't want to go then you don't have to," He said.  
"I didn't say I didn't want to," I said hoping I sounded aloof, "but if you don't want to then you don't have to take me into town. You're my handler not my chauffer."   
"No.....I didn't say I minded," he said.  
I looked at him for a couple of seconds before responding, "Okay then. Lets go." 

Our ride downtown was silent. It felt so odd. I was sleeping in the same house with, riding in a car with, and would soon be walking around the streets in plain sight with a man who SD-6 would kill be for knowing.  
_"Well actually they wouldn't kill you for knowing Vaughn, they kill you for being a double agent," _I reminded myself. Not that it helped me calm down any. This was a bad idea. I should have just stayed at the inn, should have argued more when his mother was shoving us out the door, should have gone back inside, should have-................too late we were already there. Vaughn stepped out of the car looking just as uncomfortable with this situation as I was.  
_"At least I'm not suffering alone,"_ I thought smugly as I got out of the car and shut the door behind me.   
We walked side by side down the street in front of little shops with various items displayed in their windows; some were open others weren't. The town itself was small and quaint. Just the sort of place that people dreamed of going for country vacations. I could see why Vaughn's mom opened her bed and breakfast there.  
"This feels really strange," I heard him admit.  
"Yeah," I said in agreement, "Well, just keep with the thought that we don't know each other and we'll be fine."  
He nodded but didn't make any other comments.  
"So, Michael. Your mom's place seems very nice, it must have been wonderful growing up there," I said try to along with our cover and ease the tension at the same time.  
"Actually she didn't buy that place until I left for college. We lived in Normandy until I was 8, then we moved to LA after my father died," he said.  
I stopped to face him. "Is that really true?" I whispered.  
"Yeah," he nodded after a soft chuckle. We continued walking as I processed this new information. He was born in France? I had no idea. I knew he spoke French, but so did I and I had never been there until I joined SD-6. It seemed strange that he knew pretty much my entire life story. Things that my closest friends, with the exception of Will maybe, didn't know about me but I knew so little about him.  
"So what brings you here so close to Christmas?" he asked.  
"Well I was on my way to visit a friend," I said.  
"Francie?" He asked dropping his voice considerably lower.  
I gave a slight nod and went on, "But I had a run in with a drunk driver just outside town and my car was smashed up."  
"You were in a car accident?" He asked stopping dead in his tracks.  
"Yes," I said.  
"Why didn't you tell me?!" He demanded.  
"I just did," I said quietly hoping he would follow my example and keep his voice down.  
"I mean why didn't you call me?" He asked, "Why didn't you tell the CIA?"  
"I didn't see the need. The paramedics checked me out and said I was fine," I said feeling like a teenager being lectured for staying out past curfew.  
"Are you sure? Did they take you to the hospital? If your car was damaged so much it couldn't be driven it must have been a bad accident," he said.  
"I was lucky," I stated plainly. I'll admit it was funny, and quite touching, to see how afraid he was at the thought of my being in an accident. Although it was nothing really, I'd been in much worse situations than that. 

Our conversation after that was minimal. We mostly just continued to walk on in silence until we came to the end of the street and stopped in front of a place called The Bean Palace.   
"Looks like the coffee place is open," he commented.  
"Mmm," I nodded as we breathed in the dark aroma of roasting coffee.  
"Do you want to go in and get a cup?" he asked.  
I felt a momentary tingle. Did Vaughn just as me get coffee with him? _"Sydney!" _I scolded myself, _"Could you maybe grow up? You are older than twelve you know."  
_ "Yes, that sounds nice," I said casually.  
_"Better,"_ my subconscious approved. 


	9. Chapter 9

Okay, it was official. I was the biggest moron on the face of the earth. Things were already awkward enough, and my freaking out when she told me she was in a car accident certainly didn't help, but then I had to go and ask her to coffee. I didn't even realize how much it sounded like I was asking her out on a date until the words were out of my mouth.  
I kicked myself for being such an idiot as we walked inside and up to the counter. We both ordered hazel nut cappuccinos, which we drank in the far corner. One thought kept going through my mind as we drank.  
_"I'm sitting in a cafe with Sydney Bristow."  
_ I watched her bringing her cup to her lips to sip it as the sun light poured through the window lighting up her face, and felt a smile play at the corners of my mouth. She looked really beautiful.  
_"God since when did I become such a sap?"  
_"What?" She asked amusedly suddenly looking my way. Oh great! Busted staring at her.....wonderful. Next step sexual harassment suit.  
I shook my head, "Nothing."  
She didn't comment just looked back out the window. "It's really pretty here," she said.  
I agreed joining her staring out the window. From the corner of my eye I saw her face fall. "What's the matter?" I asked. She shook her head.   
"Syd?" I said reaching across the table to take her hand. She looked up at me hesitantly. I wondered if I should release her hand.  
"It's nothing I was just thinking about holidays and how normal they are to everyone but me." she said.  
"Well if you think about it is anyone's holiday really normal? Even if you're just a regular person with a regular family," I said being careful to use the word 'regular' instead of 'normal'.   
"There'll always be something that will seem imperfect," I finished, rolling my eyes at myself. That was pathetic.  
To my surprise she nodded her head. "I suppose," she said and then looked at me for a minute, "Vaughn do you ever wish things were different?"  
"Different how?" I asked hoping my voice sounded more steady to her than it did to me.  
"Well look at us now! We can't even drink coffee together without pretending we just met a couple days ago," she said, "I mean to me....I feel like you're one of my closest friends, except we don't really know each other because we can't."  
I took a deep breath and regained my grip on her hand. "I know what you mean," I said trying to tell her with my eyes what I really meant.  
I think she understood because she nodded slowly after a couple of minutes. 

We didn't say anything after that, though the message was clear. I replayed the scene over and over again in my head to make sure I hadn't dreamed it. I decided long ago that, even if she never had the same feelings for me as I did her, I wanted to be a part of Sydney's life, and now she had practically told me that she wanted to be a part of mine also.   
It was about 1 PM by then so the sun was no longer pouring in the window, but rather sitting right at the perfect level shine right in the eyes of anyone facing east, which we unfortunately were. I ignored the blinding sun for a moment to get in another momentary gaze at Sydney.  
Suddenly an idea came to me. I started figuring through the details in my head as I watched Sydney stare into her coffee cup trying to avoid the sun. 


	10. Chapter 10

We left the cafe not a moment too soon in my opinion. I had come pretty damn close to admitting to Vaughn that I had feelings for him, which would not have been a good idea.   
We continued our walk passing some of the same shops as earlier and some different ones. It may have just been the caffeine, but I felt a little more relaxed than before. I actually felt a little guilty for just how relaxed I was right then. Was that how I had wanted to spend my vacation all along?   
_"Yes,"_ I grudgingly admitted. But was that really so weird? To want to spend Christmas with the people you love?  
_"Whoa! Did I just say love?"_ I was in serious trouble, that was obvious. I knew there was a perfectly good reason why agents were not supposed to fall for their handlers, such as the whole getting killed factor, but unfortunately some dark side of my heart or my mind, I don't know which, did not listen. I sighed. At least I wasn't the only one having to deal with this. I was pretty sure Vaughn at least had some feelings for me.  
I sighed again, there was really no point in worrying about that right now. Even if I did know for sure it wasn't as if we could do anything about it. Just going for a walk together was dangerous, but since we had already decided to take that risk I decided I might as well enjoy it. 

All in all I'd say the day was good. Even though we spent most of it in silence for fear of ruining the mood or saying to much, and when we did speak it was small talk that would go along with our cover as two strangers.   
I stopped for a moment to stretch my back, "What time is it?"  
"About five," he said glancing at his watch thoughtfully, "you want to see something neat?"  
I laughed, "Neat?"  
He stopped walking and turned to glare at me lightly, "Are you coming or not?"  
I laughed again and rolled my eyes dramatically before following. 

He lead me to a park at the edge of the town and to a hill containing a very Forrest Gump-ish bench. As I got to the top I understood what he wanted me to see. The hill was not very high but compared to the valley on the other side it was practically Mount Everest.  
"Wow," I said and stared out over the long expanse of California grape country as it dipped down low then rose up again and connected with the sky, which was, at present, streaked with orange, pink, and lavender as the sun fell.  
I looked at him and smiled, "Pretty neat."  
"You're just not going to drop that are you?" he asked.  
I just laughed. In response he sighed heavily and sulked over to a spot on the bench. If by doing so he had been trying to be unamusing, he failed miserably.  
"Okay, okay. I'm sorry. It's very pretty," I said coming over to sit next to him.  
He chuckled lightly but did not say anything. I looked back toward the valley and thought about how 'pretty' was an understatement. A view like that one was postcard material. I wondered how he discovered it. He mentioned that his mom bought the inn when he left for college. I imagined a younger version of Vaughn sitting on that very same bench to study while home over the a long weekend.  
I tore my attention away from the sunset for just long enough to notice where our hands rested side by side on the bench. I wasn't really even thinking as I did it, but I lifted my hand and laid it over his. I felt him stiffen for a moment before he turn his hand to squeeze mine back. We both stared out, pretending to still be fascinated by the view, with our hands softly clasped. He slowly ran his thumb back and forth in half circles over my first two knuckles. I sighed softly making sure not to moan and pretending that I didn't feel little butterflies flapping away in my stomach. _"Yep, I've got it bad," _I thought to myself resignedly. 

The moment ended abruptly as we released each other's hands and stood up.  
"Well, we better get going," he said clearing his throat.  
"Yeah," I agreed nodding. I took a deep breath then let it out as I started down the hill.  
"Wouldn't want to forget the milk," I called back over my shoulder. 


	11. Chapter 11

I guess I should have known Sydney wouldn't forget my mother's "buy milk" comment, unfortunately. However, at the time I barely even cared. For the rest of the afternoon whenever I thought about sitting at the top of the hill with Sydney my mind went off into a state of half awareness. I felt rather silly, actually. I was 34 and I was getting all dreamy about holding hands with a girl.  
  
At about mid-night that night, when all normal people were asleep, I sat in a chair in my room feeling tired, but unable to fall asleep sleep. Even with Sydney just a few floors above me I had trouble sleeping because thoughts of her occupied my mind. Then again, maybe that was the problem. She was close, though not close enough. I shoved those thoughts away and rose up to head toward the bathroom.

*********  
On my way out I heard soft footsteps out in the living room. My CIA indoctrinated suspicion kicked in as I slowly headed toward the sound, wishing that I had my gun with me.  
  
I saw the outline of someone standing in front of the window in the living room. Somehow I just knew that it was Sydney. I made it as far as six feet from the door way before she spun around, no doubt ready to kick my ass.  
  
"Sorry," I said holding my hands up and then dropping them.  
  
"Vaughn?" she asked stepping closer to the doorway.  
  
"Yeah," I said, coming into the room.  
  
"Oh God, I'm sorry," She said pulling her sweater closer to her body, she was wearing a pair of gray sweat pants and a tank top with a sweater over it, "I suppose I shouldn't be creeping around someone else's house in the middle of the night, but I was awake."  
  
"It's okay," I laughed.  
  
She smiled lightly, "So...some reason you're awake?"  
  
"Nothing in particular," I lied.  
  
She nodded and paused for a moment before continuing, "Listen, Vaughn, I just wanted to tell that I appreciate you being there for me today. This isn't exactly the best time of year for me with parents and it only being the second year since Danny died. Well... just thank you."  
  
I looked at her eyes for a moment before turning my gaze away. I sighed and decided that now was as good a time as any. "I have something for you," I said reaching into my pocket and pulling out a small box.  
  
She looked at me surprised, "Vaughn, you didn't have to do that."  
  
I did respond. I could see the start of a touched smile at the corners of her mouth. I had debated whether or not what I was doing was a good idea, but then eventually decided that it was just right. I watched as she removed the lid and her face fell.  
  
"Vaughn...I can't take this," she said, shaking her head and starting to give it back to me.  
  
"Of course you can Syd, it's a gift," I responded.  
  
"But, you said this watch belonged to your father," she argued, "and my mother was the one who killed him. I can't-"  
  
"Syd!" I interrupted, taking her hands and closing them around the watch. I hesitated before continuing, "I wouldn't want anyone else to have it."  
  
The expression in her eyes can only be described as pure shock. She stood staring at me as I slowly slid her hands out of mine. She looked down at her hands and swallowed hard. I wondered for a moment if I had gone too far. She looked back up at me like she was going to say something, but instead stepped forward to hug me around my back. Instinctively I returned the embrace. I held her tightly as I ingrained the memory of what she felt like in my arms into my brain. That was definitely something I wanted to hold on to for a long time.

*********  
I don't remember exactly when we decided to sit down, but I do know that I woke up the next morning leaning against the edge of the couch with Sydney sleeping against my chest. I wondered for a moment if anyone had seen us like that, but at checking my watch found that it was only five o'clock. I relaxed a little and glanced down at Sydney. She looked peaceful in her sleep, with one strand of hair across her forehead. I was about to brush it off when her eye lids slid open. She looked at me and sat up.  
  
"Oh God, we must have dozed off," she said, rubbing her eyes.  
  
"Yeah," I agreed and, against my better judgment, reached up and tucked the hair behind her ear. She stopped talking to look at me; I stared back at her searching for something to say. Finally I gave her a soft smile and whispered, "Merry Christmas, Syd."  
  
She smiled back at me with a beautiful, genuine smile, "Merry Christmas." 


	12. Chapter 12

Sydney POV

I went back to my room soon after so that we wouldn't be discovered cuddling in the living room by anyone who happened to decide to get up early. I tried to get a few more hours of sleep in, but I kept remembering the feeling of waking up in Vaughn's arms and couldn't get to sleep.

Once I finally gave up and was contemplating whether I should get up or just lay there, my cell phone rang. I rolled over to the bedside table and picked it up.  
"Hello?"  
"Miss Bristow? Yeah this is Greg. Good news, I've got your car done," Greg said over the line.  
"Oh, that's great!" I said.  
"So if you want I can hook it up to the tow truck and bring it by the inn." he offered.  
"Thank you, that's very nice. You have my address in LA so just send the bill there," I said.  
"Will do. You take care Miss Bristow," he responded cheerfully.  
_"Someone's definitely into the Christmas sprit," _I thought as I hung up, but then again I was feeling considerably happier also. I smiled to myself and went to the bathroom to take a shower.

I came out feeling warm and refreshed. I saw the tow truck driving down the road out the side window. I sighed and started gathering my things up. I loaded everything back into my bag, being careful to put Vaughn's watch safely in a small pocket. I still couldn't believe that gift. I remembered standing speechless after he gave it too me, and then hugging him as if the simple gesture could convey how amazed I was. I still couldn't help but smile every time I thought about it.

I shook my head at myself, then finished packing everything and changed into a pair of jeans and a heather gray shirt. I heaved my bag and my purse onto my shoulder, draped my jacket over my left arm, and started down the stairs.

Vaughn POV

I didn't sleep for much longer after I went back to my room, maybe half an hour or so. I finally got up at about 7:30 when I heard other people moving around in the main area of the house. I found mom filling the coffee canister in the kitchen and the other guests, minus Sydney, dancing around to Jingle Bell Rock while covering the room in decorations. Holly, poinsettias, etc.  
"You're dispensing the egg nog early this morning I see?" I joked to mom and gave her a peck on the back of her head. She turned around to look at me like I'd just told her I wanted to put on a chicken suit and swim the English Channel.  
"Yes, and how many have you had?" she asked.

I laughed and then went into the living room to take a seat. A couple minutes later I heard footsteps on the stairs. It was obviously Sydney since everyone else was already down. I looked over my shoulder, and felt my heartbeat quicken as I saw her. It's amazing how the sight of a woman in casual clothes and a pony tail could have such an affect on me. I reminded myself that I wasn't supposed to be staring.   
"Merry Christmas!!!!!" everyone yelled.  
She smiled, "Thank you everyone, Merry Christmas."  
I smiled lightly then noticed she was holding her luggage.  
"Are you leaving?" mom asked as if taking the thoughts right out of my head.  
"Yeah," she explained, "my car is fixed so time for me too go."  
"Oh no!/Stay/You don't have to leave now," everyone protested. I did along with them, but only silently. I knew it would be safer if she left as soon as possible.   
I guess she agreed because she shook her head, "No, no, really I have to get on the road."  
"Well have a safe trip," my mother said.  
"Yes thank you, and thank for the room.....for everything," Sydney said. She set down her bags and unfolded her coat. I quickly got up and went over to her.  
"Need a hand with that?" I asked casually and lifted up her bag.  
We both walked over to the door as she shrugged on her coat. At the door I handed it back to her, she smiled, "Thank you."

Suddenly a chorus of giggles came from behind us. We glanced around in confusion before realizing what it was. The decorating fairies and placed a sprig of mistletoe right above the door. _" Oh great!" _I thought sarcastically. We both laughed embarrassedly to played the normal routine; awkward since we were of the opposite sex, but not a big deal since we didn't know each other.

I glanced back at her as she found something fascinating to look at on the floor. I don't know what motivated me to do it, but I knew that it would be a long time before we'd get another chance to. When she finally looked back up, I leaned forward and pressed my lips against hers.


	13. Chapter 13

Sydney POV

I'm a great multi-tasker but there are some times in life when your mind just focuses on one thing and one thing only. Such as when bullets are flying by your head or you are being chased by 200 pound guards. Well there were no bullets and no guards that morning. However, Vaughn kissed me.

And, yes, I mean actually kissed me. My find froze and raced at the same time. I can't exactly explain what went through my head, but it was something a long the lines of:

_"Whoa! Danger, Sydney Bristow, danger!!!.......Okay, calm down. It'll be alright, it's no big deal. It's just Vaughn......Vaughn is kissing me.......holy crap Vaughn is kissing me! This is not good......actually it's feels **very** good. NO, NO, NO! This is wrong! Very, very, very wrong..........................why is it wrong again? SYDNEY! Get a grip! It's wrong because there's protocol, if the CIA ever found out you'd both be in serious trouble....and he's your handler and it would be heartbreaking because the two of you wouldn't be able to kiss again for a while ...and even though it's very unlikely SD-6 could be monitoring you...and why else? And because you're standing in front of a room full of people, including his mother, who will expect an explanation..........Vaughn, lips, kissing....oh screw it! I'm leaving, that'll be his problem!" _

In the end I found my reflexes to be smarter than me. I had already responded to the kiss without even realizing it. I don't know how long it lasted, probably around a minute. The entire time there remained a gap between us that was about a foot wide. One which he made no move to fill. My arms ached to pull him closer and deepen the kiss, but for both of us there was the knowledge that we were in front of people and were not supposed to be kissing in the first place. 

He both initiated and broke the kiss first. As we separated I searched for something to say. Not surprisingly, the room had gone silent.   
Finally he smiled at me and held out his hand, "It was nice meeting you Sydney."  
I nodded shook it, "Nice meeting you too."   
With that I turned and walked out onto the porch. I covertly tested what endurance I had left in my knees, and with every step became more confidant that they still worked. I dumped my luggage into the back and climbed up into the driver's seat. Once the door was shut I let out a breath and organized my thoughts.

There was really no point in continuing to Sacramento since Francie would be leaving the next day. I could always use the extra presents next year. So my best bet was to just head back to LA. I half a day's worth of driving with nothing to think about the entire time except kissing Vaughn.......I'd be lucky if I didn't get in another accident.

Vaughn POV

I stayed there in the doorway as I watched her walk to her car. As much as I wanted to grab her hand as she walked out the door and kiss her again, I didn't. The noise from behind me slowly started back up again. Just as Sydney was pulling away from the house I felt a presence beside me. I didn't even have to look to see who it was.  
"That was unlike you," she commented.  
"How do you know that, Mom?" I asked.  
"I know you, Michael, and you're not the type of person who would just kiss some random woman for the heck of it," she said.  
She was right of course, but I covered with a laugh. "Maybe I am and I just hid it from you?" I offered.  
She gave me a hard look for a couple of minutes before finally sighing heavily, "Okay, fine. Obviously you're not going to tell me so I'll leave it alone for now, but you know you're going to tell me the truth someday right?"  
I didn't answer and she didn't wait for one. She turned and went back inside. I looked back to the disappearing speck of Sydney's car and smiled. Yes, I knew I would, and hopefully, with luck, that day would be a day soon.

THE END


End file.
